You and your minion: totally (t)winning

Hello, spoops and ghouls! Since the start of October, you may have been seeing people bring their spookiest garbs out from their armoires in great anticipation for the All Saints Wake. Whether it be for the numerous costume contests free companies have this time of year, for pumpkin cookies, or simply just to run dungeons in something a little more festive- you’ll be seeing far less people roaming Eorzea in typical battle garb, and more witches, vampires, speedo-cats and succubi than you can count.

Instead of showcasing traditional Halloween spectres, I decided to design masks and mystic visages around some of the numerous minions within FFXIV. The looks you’ll find featured here today were some of my favorite designs over the years, as well as a few new additions. Is that really a fat chocobo, or just a Roe sporting the head lingering about a gysahl green patch? Do you swear you just saw Tataru roaming the streets of Gridania but only 5 feet taller and with some facial hair? Anything is possible during the All Saints Wake Minion Masquerade!


Behemoth Heir

The true minion may be 47th in line to the great Behemoth throne, but you’ll come in at a close 48th. Count your blessings on that- as I’d imagine the responsibilities of the Behemoth royal family are quite immense. Living in the cold climates for example! I’m sure their hides are thick enough to take it, but surely as a royal member of the household with very little chance of inheriting the throne you’d rather live somewhere a bit more hospitable- like Costa Del Sol!

There are a few mandatory things required in order to adequately resemble the Behemoth Heir: Horns, a coat, and a comfy pair of hooves (if there is such a thing).

Yoshi P. has been raining down a variety of horn glamours upon us recently, so you have your pick of the Behemoth litter! Do you want to stay with the idea that you are just a peanut of a beast? Go with the Ultima Horns or Demonic Horns! Are you an older, more majestic heir to this great lineage? Try the Arch Demon Horns or the Succubus Horns!

The most prominent part of this costume would be mimicking the Behemoth Heir’s fuzzy cloak. While you could evoke a more “royal” feeling by using the Alpine Coat, I opted for the more low-key Whisperfine Woolen Coat. You’re part of the royal family, but you’re like the Behemoth King’s sixth cousin’s son’s kid twice removed on his mother’s side. Basically no gem encrusted hooves or garments for you. With this coat you get the mix of teal and light beige that the minion wears, along with the higher neckline of the turtleneck. May not be as puffy as what this adorable minion wears, but it’ll do, Behemoth…. It’ll do.

Now I know it’s hard to believe that at one point that massive S-rank roaming around Coerthas used to be a tiny purple piglet of a thing… and even more so that those humongous claws came forth from those hooves. Allow me to misquote Mystery Science Theater 3000- repeat to yourself that this is just a game and you should really just relax.

There are few class-specific boots in this game that have a “hoof-like” appearance to them; The Wolfseye Thighboots for black mage, for example. For this particular look, I wanted to keep it “level one friendly” by utilizing the Reindeer Hooves from one of the holiday sets. Dye them a nice dark purple and they mesh quite nicely with the look!

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LaDiEs…GeNtLeLaLaS……..aTtEnTiOn!! BloOd! MaImInG! FuN fOr YoUnG★aNd★oLD! Do you love these sassy, mechanical wonders as much as I do? Good. Great- because I’m about to turn you into one!

The most pivotal piece in this costume is, by far, the Red Onion Helm. Now I know what you’re thinking: “Ved, if you’re using the helm why not just make a glamour of the Red Onion Knight minion?” Well, if you learn anything about me, it’s that I rather enjoy being difficult and I wanted to make a mammet dammet! /flips Lalafellin Step Stool. This helm may not have been intended for the use of this sophisticated automaton, but it hits all the characteristics we’d be looking for: Its bulbous, red, and has the fluffiest looking feathers on top that I ever did see! Visor that bad bad boy so there’s nothing in front of your face, and it takes on the appearance of that gold-detailing on the front of the mammet’s helm.

The rest of the outfit has a broader variety of items to choose from in order to achieve the look. However the most important thing to keep in mind going forward is the shape of the mammet. Sure you could essentially pick any black and red gear you wanted and just call it a day, but it doesn’t truly look like a mammet unless you put some effort into replicating the minions proportions. The trunk of the minion is super slender, but very broad hips that start to taper back inwards as we get down to the feet. You know what that means? It means it’s hammer time and we need to break out and celebrate the poofiest pants we can find. 

Poofy pants, however, are extremely tricky due to clipping issues. If they’re puffy too low, all boots will override the volume of the pants. If they’re puffy too high, then any chest piece with details that come down below the natural waistline will do the same thing. Isn’t clipping great? I love clipping. So. Much. Jk I can’t stand it.

The best rendition I’ve done for this part of the glamour was using Lalafellin Bloomers and Doman Steel Greaves of Fending. However not all of us are an adorable female Lalafell you just want to squeeze the puddin’ out of, so for this year’s version we are updating with a more versatile set up. But with versatility comes compromise. Adept’s Hose are a non-restrictive pair of pants with a delightful “poof” along the hips that is high up enough to not be voided out by boots of any length. A perk to this is that we can now utilize the Lominsan Officer’s Boots which have the red-hemmed detailing we would’ve have had if we just stuck with the Doman Steel ones.

What’s the downside? Almost all chest pieces deflate that much needed volume slightly. But it’s not a total loss! When paired with the Militia Cuirass, the side pieces of the chest piece add some girth to the hips to help us achieve the desired proportions! Now you’re dressed and ready to clink and clunk at things- or to say rude and offensive things to your local goldsmith! Wow!

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Puff of Darkness

Listen, I know this gal at one point huffed and puffed and sometimes obliterated us on her platform, but who could harbor any hard feelings when her minion is just so gosh darn cute!

This is probably as sultry, or “puff-puff” as my glamours ever get- but I love how her outfit reminds me of superheroes or villains outfits from cartoons of the late 80’s and early 90’s. The duality of the red and black mixed in with a pop of yellow combined in a way that could’ve easily turned her into an earlier rendition of an X-Men member.

That same duality is a slightly tougher thing to find in the FFXIV armor pieces, especially if you have to dye an item in order to achieve one of the two colors. Often when you dye the item, the other color also shifts to a different shade within the dye’s color family. Which can be a double edged sword- sometimes that’s great, but it this case makes our job a little more difficult.

One of the tops I did find that kept true to its black secondary color when dyed was the True Griffin Chestpiece of Scouting. Not only are we able to keep the red and black combination when dyed, but the piece is also moderately revealing- which gives us a tiny bit of a “va-va-voom” factor.

Her cloak was going to be the next trickiest part of the costume. If only we could pluck the sleeves from the Bonewicca Whisperer’s Jacket and just glue them over here… which I suppose is the thought process that birthed modding. Working within the confines of what FFXIV has given us, I found myself very drawn to the Batliege Kote– ninja PvP armor with wing like protrusions connected to the arms. I actually preferred this over the look of the Whisperer’s Jacket because the Kote provided two distinctive downward points which is more true to the shape of the minion’s cloak instead of frayed scalloping.

Since this gal’s got legs and knows how to use them well enough to inspire that popular Z.Z. Top song, we wanted to really show them off here. The best way to do so is with the tried and true classic- the Thavnairian Tights. I consider this particular pair of legwear the “duct tape” of glamour. Can’t find a pair of pants to work with your outfit? Try the Thavnairian Tights! “Sixty percent of the time, it works every time!”

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Spoony Bard

It must be a glamourous life being such a world renowned bard… singing songs about all sorts of majestic things. Like this bard’s hair, for example! Good gravy, he’s like an in game Fabio! People pay to brush hair like that.

The Spoony Bard minion is dressed in what most would imagine as medieval attire. There’s a healthy mix of light leathers and delicately draped cloth- more homely looking rather than loaded with jewels and over the top metal work. We’re aiming (HA, see what I did there) for well dressed, not overdressed.

I feel like leveling gear doesn’t get as much credit as it should- some of the pieces are immensely versatile and dye incredibly well. The Serge Gambison of Aiming, for example- when dyed a rich Cactuar green, the scarf takes on a much lighter and slightly yellow toned color that’s very well suited for our bard’s cloak. There’s also enough detail work to the piece that it stays visually interesting, while remaining simple enough that it would be very wearable by a wandering minstrel.

The hat was another key item in this costume- you can’t have a Spoony Bard without his signature reddish orange hat and long flowing feather! The Felt Cavalier’s Hat is an oft forgotten, all-classes item that works perfectly with this look. This stiff-brimmed hat mimics the structure of the bard’s hat and hosts that delightfully detailed neutral-toned feather.

The pants and boots you can take quite a bit more liberties with, as there are many perfectly suitable options that would work for this costume. The Dodore’s Boots were used here because I liked how they still had the medieval feel to them, as well as boasting a lighter colored trim to be true to the minion.

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Maybe it’s because they’re my favorite beast tribe, or maybe I’m still a little salty that the sylph themed glamour set from the design contest last year didn’t win. Whatever the reason, this pair of Sylph sisters is just too cute not to share! This One and the Dark One may have some major personality differences- but one thing they do have in common is their fashion sense. Essentially their entire outfit can be built from the exact same glamour items- just with a different coat of paint!

The difference between the looks lies with the headpieces. To keep with the leafy look of the Wind-up Sylph, we utilized the Serpent’s Circlet. For our violet friend, we used one of the new Arum Corsages that were implemented in the latest patch!

While for this glamour any flower would most certainly do, I particularly like the Arum Corsages for this because the shape of the flower is very similar to the tied leaves on top of the sylph’s heads.

Just like with the mammet glamour, proportions are extremely important here. Sylphs have a very distinctive, almost pear-like body shape that must be evident in your glamour in order for it to work. While we achieved the mammet shape with the use of more than one item, for this particular glamour there is a set of chest pieces that work like a dang charm. The chest pieces I’m referring to are either the Owliege or Swanliege coat which are available from PvP.

There are a lot of unique features about these particular pieces that make them the perfect focal point for this costume. Sylphs seem like they’re a weird cocktail of vegetation meets avian. Put a pair of chicken legs beneath a head of lettuce or purple cabbage and there you go: a homegrown Sylph. With that really bizarre interpretation, the feather and birdlike detail work along the bottom of the frock works really well here. The cherry on top of that? The chest pieces also feature a brooch below the neckline that perfectly replicates the stones upon a Sylphs’ chest! Does it get more perfect than that? Maybe. Probably not.

Pair these pieces with any assortment of plain pants and a pair of leaner, basic thighboots and you’ve got yourself a killer Sylph that will make This One very proud!

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Do you suppose Eos and Selene got mega jealous when Anima came into the picture? Like here they were, these two fairies forever thankful that you woke them up from an eternal slumber taking you from level 30 all the way up to 60… then Anima happened. Sure you did quests to get to know the fairies, but you GRINDED for Anima. You spent hours fate farming, light farming, queueing for some of the most painful dungeons in this game for Anima. Then when you got Anima, it was a significantly cooler looking fairy thing. I know I’m going on a tangent here, but I’m just saying, if I were Eos- I’d be a little put off.

This glamour is one I absolutely adore but I loathe how I had to make it. I try as much as possible to use items that are easily obtainable, even if they’re class specific etc. Well honey loves of mine, you’re going to have to work for this beauty!

Hats off to the gear design team this year because they rocked the Alphascape gear concept. So much so that I cried over the fact that I was eventually going to have to farm for it. Not real tears crying, but an internal “soul dying” sort of crying. The Omega Coat of Healing is utterly perfect for this look. Just perfect. Why is it so perfect? Not only is it a similar combination of metal and white fabric, but it also boasts a similar neckline as well. But wait! There’s more! The biggest visual challenge to represent for Anima was going to be the pale blue orb that sits tucked away in its abdomen. Well what do you suppose has a pale blue lining on the inside of the coat’s train? Oh that’s right, the Omega Coat of Healing. You thought the Anima grind was over; it’s only just begun. *insert dramatic music here*

Perhaps large, rounded glamours were a thing I didn’t realize I was focusing on this year, but in the same fashion of the mammet and the sylphs, Anima was going to require a nice pair of round sleeves to achieve this look. The Thavnairian Armlets could’ve been an option here, but I’m always extremely picky about how my metals mix, and I just wasn’t feeling the jive. Instead, I pulled the Swansgrace Armguards. The metal details on this item better matched our silver loaded Anima, and had the nicely rounded shape I was going for.

The last hurdle in this already wondrously challenging glamour was the legs. Anima’s leg shape is quite bizarre- starting wide up in the thigh with quite pronounced definition around the knees before tapering off into a hoof-like shape. I was incredibly amazed that I was able to find a pair of thighboots that actually had most of the features I was looking for, but a little less amazed to find out that they’d be from a Savage raid of tiers long past. The Midan Boots of Healing completed this look. The shade of gold wasn’t so abrasive that it wouldn’t work against the silver, and the shape was more than I could hope for.

Now, my little Trick-or-Treaters… Be on your best behavior out there! Hold your bags wide open and get yourself all the candy and pumpkin shaped cookies you could ever want! Be sure to stop by our Discord and share your spooktacular All Saints Wake glamours- lest you end up with more dental floss and apples in your goodie bags instead of treats.

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